Liberty Baptist Church
November 16

      • Exodus 33:13–19ESV

  • TO GOD BE THE GLORY
  • GOODNESS OF GOD
  • BEFORE THE THRONE OF GOD ABOVE
  • HOLY HOLY HOLY

      • Psalm 30:4ESV

  • Music team thank you guys for leading us this morning. Mrs. Paula thank you for stepping in this morning. I know she doesn’t want me to bring any attention to this, but this is Courtney’s last Sunday with us. She heads out this week for basic training. So Courtney we love you and are thankful for you and please know we are praying for you and Frank and Clifford.
    We’re going to do something a little different this morning, so kids don’t take off yet. I will send you up for children’s church, but the first part of this sermon is actually for you. I’m going to need your help in just a second, ok? So kiddos, just wait for just a minute.
    We went to the Redeemer Conference a few weeks ago and at the end of it they were doing a Q&A with a few pastors and their wives. They asked Dusty Thompson’s wife—I can’t remember her name—what advice she had for parents especially of pastors. She responded and said, “when parents are young with young kids, they want to write a book about how to raise kids and then they become parents with grown kids and they want to write a book on prayer.” The church I was at in NC the pastor used to say, “when I was young and married we had 1 kid and I had 4 points for how to raise kids. Now I’m older with 4 kids and no points on how to raise kids.
    I say these things recognizing I’m in the thick of it. I don’t have tips or tricks. I think the thing I’ve come to really believe, as those of you who have older or grown kids already know, is prayer really is what you desperately need to do. But we aren’t going to talk about prayer today. We are going to look at Paul’s instructions to children and to fathers. My aim is to just think about what the Scriptures say and help everyone in the room see a glimpse of what family life in Christ looks like.
    Remember, this flows out of Col. 3:1-17 which is the heart instruction for those who have been raised with Christ. Put on the new life that exists in Christ, and put to death your earthly, sinful ways. Now, Paul is showing us what that looks like in our primary relationships—marriage (what we looked at the last two weeks), family (this week), & work (next week).
    Let’s read our text, pray, and then kids, I’m going to be looking to you first for some help. Col. 3:20-21 says,
    Colossians 3:20–21 ESV
    Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.
    This is God’s Word for God’s people. Thanks be to God. Let’s pray.
    Ok starting with the kids…what does God through Paul call you to do? Obey! So our first point is this:

    Children, obey.

    Now, here’s the question we ask first…what constitutes as a child? Contextually speaking, Paul would’ve been addressing anyone who was under their parents care. If they lived under their parents roof and their parents were responsible for their wellbeing then that’s who Paul was talking to. So, if that’s you in this room, if you’re under your parents roof and they’re responsible for you then I need you to come on up here to the front. Those of you who are older—our teenagers—I need you to help me with all these little ones, ok? But you still gotta listen, too, ok?
    Ok, so Paul is writing this letter to the church at Colossae and now all the sudden he’s speaking specifically to kids! To you guys! Isn’t that pretty cool that there are parts of God’s Word that is specifically to kids?! That’s what God thinks of you—he loves you enough to speak to you. So when he does address kids, I think we better pay attention, right? That brings up 2 things just from the word children that I think you need to know today. There is actually a biblical expectation that you are a part of church, and in order to be a part do you know what you need to do? You need to pay attention.
    Now I know listening to me preach can get boring. Even some of your parents fall asleep. Sometimes, the songs are hard to sing. But even yet, I want you to work hard to pay attention to everything we do in here.
    The second thing you need to know in order to be a part is to be respectful. I want you in here. And I expect that there’s going to be times when you act like kids. Your gonna wiggle and worm and spill mom and dad’s coffee on accident and need to get up and go to the bathroom and that’s all normal. It’s ok for you to be a kid, but, when all you do is wiggle and worm and get up and walk out and come back in you become a distraction from other people, not just your parents, from hearing what the Word of God is for them. That’s kinda a big deal, isn’t it? So while it’s ok for you to be a kid, you need to be respectful of those around you.
    Be respectful & pay attention. Just from that one word. Now, what does Paul actually command you kiddos to do? What is that second word? Obey! Who do we obey? Your parents! How many of you like to obey your parents? Sometimes I did; sometimes I didn’t. I wasn’t always obedient.
    Now here’s another question…every once in a while when you leave church I’ll make a weird statement to some of you. Do you know what it is? I say, don’t forget to brush your teeth. How many of your parents tell you to brush your teeth every night? Who likes to obey that one? Can I tell you a secret? I didn’t like to obey that one. I don’t really like brushing my teeth all that much.
    It is a weird statement and I don’t really know why I say it, but if I told you kids that I had gotten each of you a toothbrush, would you believe me? If I told you to stand up, and go back there to that office and get a toothbrush who would think I was playing a silly joke on them? Why would you think I was playing a joke? Because we’re at church and that’s not where you get toothbrushes? Because I’m silly and I like to play jokes? How many of you think there actually might be a toothbrush back there?
    The reason you think there is or isn’t a toothbrush back there because of what you think of me. If you don’t me, you just know I’m the pastor and pastors always tell the truth, right? If you do know me, then you might think that I’m just tricking you. But ultimately, it comes down to what you know of my character. You would obey me to go back there because of who I am.
    So let me ask you this…what do you know of God’s character? God’s character is good. So if God is good what do you think his instructions are for you? They’re good. And they’re for your good! So when God tells you to obey your parents, kids it’s for you good.
    But that makes me ask the question, what are we supposed to obey our parents in? “In everything.” In everything? Have you guys tried obeying your parents in everything?! It seems impossible, but, there’s a couple things we need to understand about that phrase for you. Paul is speaking to Christian families in particular. So the assumption is that those parents are raising their kids in a Christian way and wanting their kids primary goal in life to be to please God.
    Second, what this flows out of in the previous verses is that Christ is in these kids. If you have believed in Jesus then he has given you his power to obey your parents, even when you don’t want to.
    Remember Jesus in the Garden of Gesthemane the night he was arrested. He said, Father, if there’s any other way, please let me do something different. But I trust you and I’ll obey you no matter what.
    Now what is obedience in everything. It is faith. Obeying our parents in everything is you living in faith. It is you trusting your parents to be good and have you do good things. But it’s not just trusting your parents, it’s trusting God. So now that you know these things, when you disobey your parents, who are you really disobeying? God.
    The good news, is that Jesus obeyed in the garden to pay for your sin of disobeying God & your parents. There’s always forgiveness for you in Christ.
    But when you do obey, guess what happens? We could look right here in this verse and see that God is pleased! God is pleased when you obey your parents because it’s a sign that you are learning to live in faith.
    But there’s more…do you know what book Paul wrote the same time he wrote Colossians? Ephesians! Let’s look real quick at Eph. 6:1-3
    Ephesians 6:1–3 ESV
    Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.”
    Same command, but more good news. There’s a promise. Life goes well and you live long.
    What happens when your parents ask you to brush your teeth and you disobey? It doesn’t go well, does it? But if you do, everybody is happy.
    Did you know that your teeth have a connection to your heart? If you don’t take care of your teeth it can affect how healthy your heart is. If your heart isn’t healthy, what happens? You don’t live long. When you obey your parents, because what they want for you is good and for your good, it’ll help you live longer. Crazy, huh?
    So back to my toothbrush…who thinks I got you a toothbrush? I did. Here in just a second I want you to go back there and Ms. Jennifer will give you each a toothbrush and tonight when you go to brush your teeth I want you to remember that you’re obeying your parents because God has told you and God is good. Brush em good because it is for your good. Brush your teeth asking God to help you obey your parents and obey him in all things and he will. He loves his kids. He speaks to them. He helps them. Even to brush their teeth. So, kids…don’t forget to brush your teeth. Y’all go back there and get you a toothbrush. If you’re 4-5 you’re free to go on upstairs for the rest of the sermon.
    While they’re headed back there, parents I need to speak to you. How awesome is it that we have this many kiddos in here? I love it and I pray that never changes. But in order for us to help them know that we love them and that we want them to be a part of this is to be gracious. And you are, so this is a reminder, not a reprimand.
    Be gracious to the kids who are having a bad day. Don’t move away from those kids or make them and their parents feel isolated. In love move forward and offer to help. And you know who else you need to be gracious to when it’s a bad day? Their mom & dad. I know what it’s like to have a rough morning and then get to church and they don’t act like what I expect them to act like so I get frustrated and I act out—even sinfully—because I’m embarrassed or frustrated. I need your grace. My kids especially need your grace in that moment. This should be the safest place in the world to raise kids. This should be the safest place to fail and then find restoration. So be gracious.
    The other thing I want everyone to know is some LBC distinctives. This came from pastors before me but I agree with them. Know this, all kids are welcome in here. We love having crying babies, we just don’t want crying babies to become a distraction from hearing the gospel. We all need that every Sunday, so we want to try and help you so that you can engage with the gospel each Sunday. For the whole service, we have nursery for infants-3 years old. When they turn 4, we love to have them in here for musical part of worship. In fact, our music person, my mom, intentionally picks songs for kids to sing. The Goodness of God that we sang this morning is on our list because kids sing it so well. It’s a good song too, but kids in particular love it.
    We also recognize that for a 4-5 yo to sit through a service can be really tough, so we dismiss them from the sermon part so they’re able to stretch their legs a little and get some more age focused teaching.
    Once they turn 6, we love for them to sit in here. No, I do not think that they will listen to everything I say. Yes, I do think they’ll need to crawl up and down to get stuff to color with. We even have a little basket thing under that table back there with stuff to help keep your kids occupied. But they are watching and learning. They see you sing, or don’t sing. They see you engage in the preaching or fall asleep. They’re watching you and learning what it means to be a part of a church. So we want them here, but it means you have an active role even sitting there in their discipleship.
    I get every kid is different. That’s ok. This is just our general observations and how we’ve tried to lay out some tracks to help you in the discipleship of your children. So children, obey and parents be gracious.
    Immediately after instructing kids, where does Paul turn? Fathers!
    Colossians 3:20–21 ESV
    Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.
    I know, fathers, you may be going, I got rocks thrown at me last week as a husband, now as a father? Yes. This second point is directed to you. Paul is saying:

    Parent with power & purpose.

    Now before I get into this I recognize this point can bring up a lot of pain. You might have not had a father, or maybe you had a bad father; you might not be able to be a father, or maybe you just lost your father. The very word can hurt. That’s not my intent. In fact, if I was to summarize this point it’d be that yes fathers your job is weighty, and honestly the shoes are too big for you to fill. But the most important thing you can do as a father is to show your children there is a heavenly father who is what our kids truly long for—he’s whom we all truly long for. I’m praying for those of you to whom this word stings. I see you, but more importantly, so does your heavenly father and where your earthly father was lacking he is not.
    In fact, that’s why I think Paul’s instructions here were in the negative and not the positive. He says, “do not provoke.” Isn’t that interesting? Like if you’ve got one sentence to tell fathers would your instruction be to not provoke? I don’t think that’d be where I’d go. Why is this where Paul goes?
    To provoke means to stir up. I was at the Dalhart vs. Shallowater football game. The Shallowater qb through a ball just up in the air. We went to get it and had every right to the ball and their guy came and ran into ours and we got called for pass interference. I was provoked. Still am to be honest. I jumped up and yelled. The action outside of me stirred up something inside of me. Dads, don’t our actions do the same thing?
    If you’re a parent in this room I can’t recommend these two books to you strong enough. We’ve got a couple copies of the parenting one and this is the only copy of Shepherding a Child’s Heart. Both are phenomenal and you need to read them both. In Shepherding a Child’s Heart Tedd Tripp talks about how are kids hearts are oriented one of two ways: towards God, or towards idols. Dads what you do or don’t do causes your kids to react in such a way that it reveals which one of those two things your kids hearts are directed toward. Your action, reaction, or lack of action is going to stir your kids to something, but to what? Will it direct their hearts towards the one to whom they’re created, or will it inflame idol worship in their hearts?
    Now, we can be tempted to go, that’s their problem. But really when you think about it, your action or lack thereof to your kids is actually revealing of where your heart is facing.
    I sat down this week and began to think about how I provoke my kids. Paul’s command here is negative, so I was thinking specifically about how I provoke my kids negatively. I came up with a list and then asked my wife. She was kind and gentle…and honest..and added to it. Here’s my list I came up with:
    Pick too hard
    I go too far
    I mock
    I can be demeaning
    I can heap guilt on them
    I can point out their flaws and weaknesses
    I can make them feel ignorant
    I can be impossible to please
    I can be only angry some days
    I can only be demanding
    Never show them the gospel either in word or deed.
    I’m sure there are more, but it’s what I came up with and honestly, it’s been crushing. I didn’t want to write this sermon. Then I studied and learned about all the things I should do and it just became burdensome. So I put it off.
    I’m trying to finish a book I started reading like back at the beginning of summer and in it I read this quote by Richard Sibbes who was a Puritan: “What will we do for him, if we will not feast with him?” That quote struck me. Because I can begin to think of all the things I should and shouldn’t do for my kids but if I’m running on my tank of strength or the meals that I’ve eaten, I’ll run out. I’ll burn up and in the process everything around me will burn down. I won’t make it and neither will my kids. When I try to parent on my own strength, knowledge, wisdom, or history, I will end up sacrificing my kids on the altar of my ego and what will that provoke them to do?
    You see the good news of the gospel is come to me and find not just the strength you need to move forward, but the character and compassion your kids need to grow in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Because at this table do you know who you find?
    Colossians 3:12–15 ESV
    Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful.
    This is Christ’s heart towards you! He has a compassionate heart that feels what we feel, he is kind towards us, he has been humble for us and goodness meekness--he wasn’t concerned with privilege but did what was necessary to redeem us. He has been eternally patient with us and when we don’t repent he bears with us until we do so that he can forgive us. It is only in him that perfect love exists and when he reigns it is his peace that rules over us. And when you’re united with Christ this is who you’ll become.
    So fathers, have you had a seat at the table and feasted with Jesus? Have you gotten to know him as these things to you personally? Because in knowing him as these things, do you know what he empowers you to become? These things! You can actually embody these character attributes to your kids in the power of Christ, because, Col. 3:11, Christ is all and in all! If Jesus is not this to you today then the call for you is to have a seat at the table and feast. Know him. Enjoy him. Delight in him. What can you do for him, if you will not feast with him?
    If you have feasted with Jesus, and he is these things to you then you might still be going, what do I do so that Jesus becomes enough for my kids? How do I not provoke them to discouragement but instead to worship? There’s 2 ways I want to suggest to you that you raise your kids in such a way that it provokes worship instead of discouragement. Here they are: powerfully & purposefully.
    Zoom out with me on Colossians. I’ll put this on the screen but it’ll be hard to see.
    Colossians 3:18–4:1 ESV
    Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them. Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged. Bondservants, obey in everything those who are your earthly masters, not by way of eye-service, as people-pleasers, but with sincerity of heart, fearing the Lord. Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ. For the wrongdoer will be paid back for the wrong he has done, and there is no partiality. Masters, treat your bondservants justly and fairly, knowing that you also have a Master in heaven.
    Do you see the recurring theme? Kinda makes sense flowing out of Col. 3:17
    Colossians 3:17 ESV
    And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.
    That phrase, “in the Lord,” is where you find your power and your purpose. If your parenting comes from your flexing, or you knowledge, or your wisdom, it’s idol worship on your part. But when you parent in the Lord you’re not relying on yourself, but depending on the Lord to work in you and through you. You aren’t claiming authority over your children just because they’re your children, instead you recognize your authority is bestowed on you by the Lord for the Lord.
    Here’s why this is a better way—do you need wisdom or knowledge in how to raise those kids? Do you need wisdom or knowledge in how to provoke worship in their hearts instead of discouragement?
    Colossians 2:3 ESV
    in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge.
    Jesus is the source of all wisdom & knowledge so feast with him and find it. James 1:5
    James 1:5 ESV
    If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.
    Not wisdom for manipulation. Not wisdom for comfort. Not wisdom for success and approval, but wisdom for stirring up worship in your kids heart.
    Jesus is the source of all wisdom and knowledge, but he’s also the power to live behind it. Last phrase of Col. 3:11
    Colossians 3:11 ESV
    but Christ is all, and in all.
    When you repent and believe and Jesus and you sit at the table and feast with him not only does he fill you up, he empowers you to live it out. So when you depend on him and are satisfied in him you can expect him to work through you powerfully & purposefully.
    What does that look like? This means that we aren’t raising kids with a moralistic therapeutic deism framework or worldview. What does that mean? Moralistic = people with good morals; good people. Therapeutic = feel good about yourself. Therapy culture is a real thing. People go to a therapist to feel good about themselves. Deism = there is a god. So moralistic therapeutic deism means that we raise kids to have good morals so that they and we can feel good about ourselves all in the name of god—usually that god being me.
    The world is full of moralistic therapeutic deism—especially in the Bible belt. “In the Lord” calls us to raise our kids to be worshippers of the Lord. Our aim and goals of our children isn’t success and moralism, but worshippers. So we parent purposefully to provoke or stir up their hearts to see Jesus as worthy and beautiful and good, or like Forrest Frank says, to see Jesus’ way as better.
    Now fathers, this call to raise our kids purposefully and powerfully is heavy, but you must see that it doesn’t all depend on you. You can’t make their hearts turn towards Jesus. Your aim is to show them who he is. It is to provoke them towards Christ. But in order to do that Jesus has to be all for you. Is he? Does your parenting provoke discouragement or worship? Your children’s reaction to you is revealing not just of what’s in them, but of what’s in you.
    Col. 3:21 is a real command: “Fathers, do not provoke your children.” It’s one that as I look back on I see that I’ve failed. Some of you, like me this week have a list. That list crushes you, but the call for you this morning is to run to Christ who can lift you & the Christ who can fill you. Find resurrection power and transformation in him. Find freedom to ask your children for forgiveness because Christ has forgiven you. Find power to become who Christ is to you and who he is in you and in so doing find a new purpose in parenting.
    Children, Col. 3:20 is a real command. Obey your parents in everything. If you’re like me or my kids, you probably haven’t done that perfectly this week. Just like your mom and dad, the call for you this morning is to look to the one who obeyed perfectly. See him as the one who can cleanse you forever and find in him the power to obey your parents in everything.
    I want to ask the music team to come on up. I’m going to pray here shortly, but before I do I want to put the words to the song we’re about to sing on the screen:
    O great God of highest heav’n Occupy my lowly heart Own it all and reign supreme Conquer ev’ry rebel pow’r Let no vice or sin remain That resists Your holy war You have loved and purchased me Make me Yours forever more
    This song is not a performance; it’s a prayer. It’s a confession. It’s a declaration of hope. And it’s a reminder that the same Christ who loves you is the Christ who changes you.
    So let me pray. Then let’s stand and sing — not in despair, not in self-reliance, but with confidence that in Christ, fathers and children alike are loved forevermore.
    Let’s pray.

      • Colossians 3:20–21ESV

      • Ephesians 6:1–3ESV

      • Colossians 3:20–21ESV

      • Colossians 3:12–15ESV

      • Colossians 3:18–4:1ESV

      • Colossians 3:17ESV

      • Colossians 2:3ESV

      • James 1:5ESV

      • Colossians 3:11ESV

  • YET NOT I BUT THROUGH CHRIST IN ME
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