Eagles Nest Church
Don't Wait On The Porch
  • This morning we ended where Jesus ended.
    The music is still playing.
    The father is still standing outside.
    And the older brother still hasn't answered.
    And Jesus left it that way on purpose.
    The Pharisees were the older brother,
    and the question was theirs to answer.
    But it's ours too.
    Most of us in this room aren't in the far country.
    We're in the field, working hard, close enough to the house to hear the music.
    So our focus here is on Mondays with the person whose name came to mind during the sermon.
    And it's about what it means to come to the Lord's Table with people you didn't choose,
    some of whom have hurt you.
    1: The Older Brother in Us
    Tim Keller, whose sermons on this parable influenced a lot of my study this week,
    points out that the older brother never looks lost.
    He isn't in a pigpen.
    He's in the field, working.
    So how do you spot older-brother lostness?
    Keller draws several signs out of the text.
    Here are four.
    Four signs of older-brother lostness:
    An undercurrent of anger.
    "But he was angry and refused to go in" (v. 28).
    His anger grew out of a belief:
    I've been good, so I'm owed.
    And since life never goes the way we think we deserve,
    that belief produces a low, steady anger.
    Sometimes it's aimed at God.
    Sometimes it's aimed at ourselves or others.
    QUESTION:
    When something doesn't go your way, what do you tend to say to yourself and what does it reveal about what you think God owes you?
    Four signs of older-brother lostness:
    An undercurrent of anger.
    Duty without delight.
    Look, these many years I have served you" (v. 29).
    The word Luke uses is the language of slave service.
    He lived in his father's house like a hired hand on the clock.
    He obeyed,
    but he never enjoyed his father.
    And the father's answer exposes it:
    "Son, you are always with me, and all that is mine is yours" (v. 31).
    He could have had a goat anytime. He never asked.
    Keller tells about a college music class where he listened to Mozart to pass a test.
    Years later he spends money just to listen to Mozart.
    Same music, different reason.
    One is useful.
    The other is beautiful.
    The older brother found his father useful. He never found him beautiful.
    QUESTION:
    Think about your Bible reading, your prayer, and your serving. Which parts feel like duty, and which feel like delight? What would it look like to enjoy God and not just use Him?
    Four signs of older-brother lostness:
    An undercurrent of anger.
    Duty without delight.
    Certainty about everyone else.
    "But when this son of yours came, who has devoured your property with prostitutes" (v. 30).
    Again, notice that He won't say "my brother."
    He already has him pegged:
    guilty.
    Keller makes the point that older brothers are often unsure where they stand with God,
    but very sure where everyone else stands.
    Four signs of older-brother lostness:
    An undercurrent of anger.
    Duty without delight.
    Certainty about everyone else.
    He can’t forgive.
    As we saw this morning,
    that's because he doesn't think he needs much forgiveness himself.
    You can't stay angry at someone for long unless somewhere inside you're thinking,
    "I would never do that."
    Question:
    Is there someone you've mentally filed as "this son of yours"? What do you need to do to be able to call them "my brother" or "my sister" instead?
    One caution before we move on.
    This list is a mirror, not a window.
    We don't get to falsely diagnose anyone else as an older brother.
    Which has some irony to it.
    Because those of us who were once younger brothers can become older brothers toward older brothers.
    We end up looking down on the people who look down on others.
    So don’t do that.

    Part 2: What Forgiveness Is (and Isn't)

    In the Bible, Jesus told another story about a debt.
    In Matthew 18, Peter asks how many times he has to forgive his brother.
    Jesus answers with a servant who owed his king ten thousand talents, a debt he could never repay in a hundred lifetimes.
    The king forgives all of it.
    Then that same servant walks out,
    finds a man who owes him a hundred denarii,
    and grabs him by the throat.
    When the king hears about it, he says,
    "Should not you have had mercy on your fellow servant, as I had mercy on you?" (Matthew 18:33).
    Every sin against you creates a debt.
    Someone took your money, your reputation, your peace, or your trust.
    And there are only two things you can do with a debt.
    You can make them pay it, or you you pay and absorb it yourself.
    Keller puts it this way:
    forgiveness is absorbing the pain instead of inflicting it.
    That's what the father did.
    He took the loss of his estate and the shame of a son who wished him dead, and he absorbed it.
    And that's what God did for us at the cross,
    on an infinitely bigger scale.
    Keller makes a really good point here.
    Why could the father run and kiss his son the moment he saw him?
    Because all those months, he had been kissing him in his heart.
    If you spend months clobbering someone in your heart,
    you'll clobber them when they finally show up.
    Question:
    How do people "make someone pay" without ever saying a word?
    The Bible talks about forgiveness in two ways, and we need to keep them straight.
    First, there's what happens between you and God. (Vertical)
    Jesus said, "And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses" (Mark 11:25).
    That's your heart.
    You hand the debt over to God.
    You stop replaying the tape and rehearsing the case.
    You refuse bitterness, whether the other person ever says sorry or not.
    What does that look like on an ordinary Tuesday?
    You pray for them by name.
    You stop bringing it up, to them, to others, and to yourself.
    And when you get a chance to do them good, you take it.
    Second, forgiveness is also what happens between you and them. (Horizontal)
    Luke 17:3 ESV
    3 Pay attention to yourselves! If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him,
    That's forgiveness granted face to face:
    "I forgive you. It's settled."
    It aims at reconciliation, and Jesus says you go after it.
    You don't wait on the porch for them to grovel before you.
    Forgiveness also isn't pretending it never happened.
    The younger son didn't get his inheritance back.
    It isn't instant trust, because broken trust takes time to rebuild.
    And it isn't staying in danger.
    If someone has abused you or broken the law,
    forgiving them doesn't mean staying quiet or putting yourself back in harm's way.
    Question:
    Why do we so often confuse forgiveness with trust? How does keeping the two separate actually make forgiveness easier?
    So where does the power to forgive come from?
    First, you have to let go of superiority.
    As Keller says: You can't nurse a grudge unless you believe you're better than the person who hurt you.
    And the gospel takes that away.
    If it took the death of God's Son to save you,
    you can't look at anyone and say, "I would never."
    Forgiveness means you have to release them from what they owe.
    That's easier when you know how rich you are.
    If you have a billion dollars in the bank, a hundred-dollar debt doesn't keep you up at night.
    In Christ, you've been given everything. "All that is mine is yours."
    What can anyone take from you that God hasn't already given back?
    Here's a test:
    If that person's failure would bring you a little satisfaction,
    if you'd be secretly glad to hear things went badly for them, you're still holding the debt.
    Question:
    Is there someone whose bad news would feel like good news to you? What would it take to start absorbing that debt this week?
    Ephesians 4:32 ESV
    32 Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.
    The truth is, remembering how much you've been forgiven changes the way you see the person who hurt you.

    Part 3: Life Together at the Table

    Notice how the parable ends.
    The father doesn't just want his sons safe.
    He wants them at the same table.
    "It was fitting to celebrate and be glad, for this your brother was dead, and is alive" (v. 32).
    The feast isn't complete until both sons are inside.
    Paul says the same thing about the Lord's Table:
    1 Corinthians 10:17 ESV
    17 Because there is one bread, we who are many are one body, for we all partake of the one bread.
    In 1 Corinthians 11 we saw the Corinthians eating the Supper while humiliating their poorer brothers,
    and Paul said that wasn't the Lord's Supper at all.
    And Jesus put it even more bluntly:
    Matthew 5:23–24 ESV
    23 So if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, 24 leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.
    Question:
    What does it look like to examine yourself before the Table in terms of your relationships? What should you do if someone comes to mind as the bread and the cup are being passed?
    Here's something we don't think about enough.
    You chose this church, but you didn't choose your brothers and sisters in it.
    That's how families work.
    Some of the people at this Table are people you'd never pick as friends.
    And that's the point.
    The gospel builds a family out of people who have nothing in common
    except that they were lost and the Father found them.
    And here is what that kind of family looks like:
    We restore each other gently.
    Galatians 6:1 ESV
    1 Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted.
    That's the opposite of the older brother.
    He kept watch on his brother in a judgmental and condemning way.
    But Paul says keep watch on yourself.
    And as we do, we lovingly tell each other the truth.
    James 5:16 ESV
    16 Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.
    A church full of older brothers is a church where nobody admits anything.
    A church that understands grace is a place where sinners can be honest and grow together in faith and love.
    So we welcome the ones who come home.
    When someone who wandered walks back through those doors,
    our first word shouldn't be "Where have you been?"
    It should be the father's word:
    "This my son was dead, and is alive again" (v. 24).
    And remember where this Table is headed.
    Last week we read,
    Revelation 19:9 ESV
    9 And the angel said to me, “Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the marriage supper of the Lamb.” And he said to me, “These are the true words of God.”
    Every time we come to this Table, we're getting a small taste of that feast.
    On that day, nobody will be standing outside comparing records.
    We'll all be inside, and we'll all know why we're there.
    Question:
    When a younger brother comes back to church, what's our first instinct as a congregation? What would it look like to run to them like the father did?
    The Father has done everything to bring us home.
    Jesus, our true older Brother, left His Father's house, came looking for us,
    and paid for the feast with His own body and blood.
    Every time we come to this Table,
    we remember that we didn't earn our seat.
    We were brought in.
    So here's the question is: who do you need to call "brother" this week?
    Maybe it's someone you need to forgive in your heart before God today.
    Maybe it's someone you need to go to and seek reconciliation with, as far as it depends on you (Romans 12:18).
    Or maybe it's someone who's come home, and you've been standing outside with your arms crossed.
    Whatever your situation is, don't wait on the porch.
    The music's still playing.
    So come in and enjoy the Father’s feast.

      • Luke 17:3ESV

      • Ephesians 4:32ESV

      • 1 Corinthians 10:17ESV

      • Matthew 5:23–24ESV

      • Galatians 6:1ESV

      • James 5:16ESV

      • Revelation 19:9ESV

Eagles Nest Church
pastorzach@eaglesnestmn.org
(218) 562-5252
http://www.eaglesnestmn.org
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